Before Buying Your McDonnell Douglas Military Aircraft

MCDONNELL DOUGLAS AIRCRAFT - SPACE SYSTEMS - MISSILES

Important! Important!

Please fill out and mail this card within 10 days of purchase:

Thank you for purchasing a McDonnell Douglas military
aircraft. In order to protect your new investment, please
take a few moments to fill out the warranty registration
card below. Answering the survey questions is not required,
but the information will help us to develop new products
that best meet your needs and desires.

1. _Mr. / _Mrs. / _Ms. / _Miss / _Lt. / _Gen. / _Comrade /
   _Classified / _Other

   First Name____________________ Initial(s)____
   Last Name_________________________
   Awards/Medals__________________________

   Latitude________________________
   Longitude__________________________________

   Altitude________________________ Password, Code Name,
   etc.__________________

2. Which model aircraft did you purchase?

  _F-14 Tomcat / _F-15 Eagle / _F-16 Falcon / _F-19A Stealth
  / _Classified

3.Date of purchase: Month___________ Day___________
Year____________

Serial Number____________________

4. Please check where this product was purchased:

   _ Received as Gift/Aid Package
   _ Catalog Showroom
   _ Sleazy Arms Broker
   _ Mail Order
   _ Discount Store
   _ Government Surplus
   _ Classified

5. Please check how you became aware of the McDonnell
   Douglas product you have just purchased:

   _ Heard loud noise, looked up
   _ Store Display
   _ Espionage
   _ Recommended by friend/relative/ally
   _ Political lobbying by Manufacturer
   _ Was attacked by one

6. Please check the three (3) factors which most influenced
   your decision to purchase this McDonnell Douglas product:

   _ Style/Appearance
   _ Kickback/Bribe
   _ Recommended by salesperson
   _ Speed/Maneuverability
   _ Comfort/Convenience
   _ McDonnell Douglas Reputation
   _ Advanced Weapons Systems
   _ Price/Value
   _ Back-Room Politics
   _ Negative experience opposing one in combat

7. Please check the location(s) where this product will be
   used:

   _ North America
   _ Central/South America
   _ Aircraft Carrier
   _ Europe
   _ Middle East
   _ Africa
   _ Asia/Far East
   _ Misc. Third-World Countries
   _ Classified

8. Please check the products that you currently own, or
   intend to purchase in the near future:

   Product:
                             Own        Intend to
                                        purchase
   Color TV:
   VCR:
   ICBM:
   Killer Satellite:
   CD Player:
   Air-to-Air Missiles:
   Space Shuttle:
   Home Computer:
   Nuclear Weapon:
   Army of Mercenaries:

9. How would you describe yourself or your organization?

   Check all that apply:

   _ Communist/Socialist
   _ Terrorist
   _ Crazed
   _ Neutral
   _ Democratic
   _ Dictatorship
   _ Corrupt (Latin American)
   _ Corrupt (Other)
   _ Primitive/Tribal

10.How did you pay for your McDonnell Douglas product?

   _ Cash
   _ Suitcases of Cocaine
   _ Oil Revenues
   _ Deficit Spending
   _ Personal Check
   _ Credit Card
   _ Ransom Money
   _ Traveler's Check
   _ Didn't pay, just pointed the odd ICBM in our direction

11. Please give the occupations of yourself and your spouse:

Occupation:
                                 You            Your Spouse
    Homemaker
    Sales/Marketing
    Revolutionary
    Clerical
    Mercenary
    Tyrant
    Middle Management
    Eccentric Billionaire
    Defense Minister/General
    Retired
    Student
    Unemployed

12. To help us understand our Customers' lifestyles, please
    indicate the interests and activities in which you and
    your spouse enjoy participating on a regular basis:

Activity/Interest:
                                      You       Your Spouse
    Golf
    Boating/Sailing
    Sabotage
    Running/Jogging
    Propaganda/Disinformation
    Destabilizing/Overthrow
    Invasion of smaller neighbour
    Default on Loans
    Gardening
    Crafts
    Black Market/Smuggling
    Collectibles/Collections
    Watching Sports on TV
    Sadism/Torture
    Wines
    Interrogation/Torture
    Household Pets
    Crushing Rebellions
    Espionage/Reconnaissance
    Fashion Clothing
    Border Disputes
    Mutually Assured Destruction

Thanks for taking the time to fill out this questionnaire.
Your answers will be used in market studies that will help
McDonnell Douglas serve you better in the future - as well
as allowing you to receive mailings and special offers from
other companies, governments, extremist groups, and
mysterious consortia.

Comments or suggestions about our fighter planes? Please
write to:

                  McDONNELL DOUGLAS CORPORATION
                  Marketing Department
                  Military Aerospace Division
                  P.O. Box 800
                  St. Louis, MO 55500
                  USA